Approximately less than 20 seconds to read
'Truth will hurt.
Lie will kill.'
Truth and lie are like real and fake.
Real will show eventually, just like the truth will come out eventually.
Fake is the cover-up of real, just like a lie is a cover-up of truth.
This story made me:
almost 3 years ago Ian Christ said:
I like this one a bit more. Your approach is very point a to point b, which isn't a problem, but not my particular favorite style. Good job though.
almost 3 years ago Allykat said:
Ah, a very true message to this indeed. It's pretty relevant to my life right now, so I really liked this one :)
almost 3 years ago james said:
Oh, my gosh. My mistake, I'm not swapping with you. I'm swapping with someone else. I'm so sorry. My bad.
almost 3 years ago Lorelle Shorten said:
I love this. The concept is written really well :)
almost 3 years ago R.W.III said:
"Truth is probably the most horrible thing on earth"
The writing starts out. How can that be? There are far
worse things than telling the truth and it's usually
seen as good, you may be wondering. Now if you stick
with this short poem by Lacey Dentelle, I can tell you
then what that might be.
The Truth About Truth is a revelation on the pain honesty
can cause someone. But what if you were to hold that back?
That's what this poetry is about. It takes a comparison between lies and telling the truth and really lets you have it.
It sends a positive message really letting you know that sometimes enduring suffering can be worth the benefits it results in. On the flip side, it kind of breaks in the transition at the middle, which might catch you off guard.
However, stick through it and give it a second glance and you'll see what this is all about. All in all, good short poetry that takes about 5 seconds of your day to read.
Part 1 of Swap:
In all honesty, I did truly like this poem. It was however, a little bit bumpy and it flowed it a little less than nicely overall. Once a second look was taken at it, I realized it fit with the poem a little better than I had originally thought, but you want to reader to get full impact on their first read, I feel, that they shouldn't have to do a second.
Additionally, I though that this had a lot of emotion in it, which can truly show through if you are meant to be a writer - if you are able to compact so much emotion into such a small piece. Which you did! And that was wonderful!
In addition to what someone else said in their review, the end doesn't make a lot of sense, but, I do realize what you were doing and I do it a lot in narrative poetry myself and actually really enjoy the choppy way it makes it. If you wanted to keep the same thing was the sentence, then I would change the wording to something along the lines of "The truth will hurt you, unless the lies kill you" or including an "or" in the place.
(Please don't take any offense to my review, I did not intend to hurt to feelings of the author, only to give constructive criticism in order to attempt for them to become better at the craft.)
As always, great job! I really do love reading your writing. :)