A Bright Place

1 chapter / 183 words

Approximately less than a minute to read

Description:

my entry for the #BrightPlaces contest

Genres: Writing, Poetry

Tags: brightplaces poetry elliot michael

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This story made me:

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Comments {35}

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5 months ago Jasper Whitton said:

Amazing book! I loved it

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about 2 years ago ForestWalker said:

I loved the way the words flowed, and picture you form in the mind of the reader is clear and life-like. Amazing job! :)

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over 2 years ago Tiger Cat said:

wow! this book is amazing! great job!

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over 2 years ago Alena Parker said:

I enjoyed the bubbly word flow! Great separations between thoughts. The poem was very well done!! :) Have a good day, Lovely!

~Lia

Reviews {9}

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over 2 years ago Gretchin Bledsoe said:

Wow, this is so beautiful! While reading it, I feel the warmth and the cool breeze and the permeating peace. I love it. And even if it isn't a real place, you know how to make it feel real. I feel as if I'm present in the story, and you make it easy to believe I am.

I didn't catch any grammatical errors. Nice job.

For the swap, could you read my #BrightPlaces contest entry called 'My Place of Inspiration' please? Thanks.

Again, really great job. You've got my vote ;)

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over 2 years ago B. Blakmyre said:

Nice job! I do agree that the last line was a bit inconsistent with the rest of the poem, but I think the sentiment is nice. The reason why this part doesn't seem to fit is because the whole poem focuses on a private place, and suddenly introducing someone else doesn't seem right. I suggest adding something earlier on about how love thrives in this place, or that you wish there were others you could share it with. Other than that, you paint a nice picture of your bright place, and it's a relaxing read. Keep up the good work!

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