Approximately 2 minutes to read
Marina just can't seem to get a break in life. She tries to take her life in her own hands, but she learns that she's not as alone as she thinks.
Drama, Romance, Flash Fiction
This story made me:
about 5 years ago Priscilla Michaels said:
I really love this... something many teenagers, even adults, can relate to. Even some children. I also love the Happy Ending, even though i'm not one to believe in happy endings :P
I only found ONE grammar error, and that was the "g" needs to be capitalized in "good". Really love it. Also, thanks for the advice on my book, A Day To Remember.
about 5 years ago Kristin P said:
I think that the story is good(well its not exactly a happy story, but you get what I mean). I will agree with a previous comment that it seems a little rushed, but I can see that it has to be that way given what you are entering it into. My only critique would be that at the end it seems almost a little too clean, like a little too "they all lived happily after". Maybe somehow incorporate more of her lingering struggles because of what happened to her. This story also leaves me with one question, after she speaks with a social worker does she get put into a different home/where does she end up living?
Overall I really like the story and the message that it only takes one person change someone's life. I hope that I was even a little helpful. :)
about 5 years ago Monica Tlachac said:
You have a nice story with a happy ending. It would fit better into a much longer word length, unfortunatly. I know you have the contest, however, so good job trying to make it fit within the word limit. The ending felt really rushed, but, again, we can blame that on the word limit. The only editing advice that I really think you should do is to watch capitalization. You had a few randome things that weren't capitalized and "good" that started a sentence wasn't. Keep writing. You have a strong voice/style
about 5 years ago Nganga Naima said:
Great job. really inspiring. I loved your details and creation of imagery. This is relatable to many people:)